Media (and the evil flowchart request :-)

Prior to creating this blog I had an email exchange with a couple friends of mine that I thought might be worth sharing.  Here is my original email:

Bethany and I have been very careful with the media that we bring into our house. We haven’t had cable or satellite TV since Haven was born, we have been careful what DVDs we rent, and we try to live by the policy of “if its not good for our kids to see than its probably not good for us to see” (although we have broken that principal many times). However, when it comes to video games the only thing I have really limited from my kids is first-person-shooters. This weekend I was sitting in my office and Noble was playing a game of BFME with Canaan. He was saying things like:

I’m going to send my Nazgul to kill you

I’m going to use my wizard’s magic powers to destroy your armies

My trolls are more powerful than your goblins.

Anyway, I was sitting there thinking about verses from the Bible like:

1. Philippians 4:8 – Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.

2. Galatians 5:19-24 – 19 Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, 21 envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. 24 Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.

3. Proverbs 22:6 – Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

What I am struggling with is the balance between holiness and legalism. I don’t want to put any unnecessary burden on me or my family. However, I also don’t want to be deceived into thinking that I can honor God and still live as my passions (flesh) directs me. When I am honest with myself, games like BFME feed the “lust of the flesh, the pride of life, and the lust of the eyes”, they are filled with violence, sorcery, and evil characters. They are “fun” but am I honoring Christ as I play them:

1. 1 John 2:16 – For everything in the world–the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does–comes not from the Father but from the world.

2. Galatians 5:16 – So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature.

3. Ephesians 2:3 – All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath.

The question I am trying to answer for myself and that I believe your input could help me in coming to a reasonable conclusion is “What should the boundary be?” In other words, is AOE okay, but BFME is not? On what grounds? Are they both okay or both unwise? This question extends beyond electronic games and includes board games ranging from Chess to Dungeons and Dragons. What are the “triggers” or “characteristics” of “permissible” games versus games that dim the light of my witness and the sensitivity of my conscience to the Holy Spirit? I have witnessed over the years Christians playing every type of first person shooter and magical based rts game on the market, not to mention the pirating of copyrighted software as if there is nothing wrong with it. I am not trying to judge others; it is actually comparing myself to others that has made me think its ok to do those things. It is in comparing myself to scripture that I find myself lacking. I had a short conversation with Bethany about this topic and she is clearly and has been for some time completely against games like BFME and Starwars Galactic Battlegrounds for reasons similar to those stated above. I tried to argue the opposite position (since I enjoy these games and would like to continue playing them) and found myself saying things like:

1. I don’t want to not play just because of some weird kind of legalism and paranoia

2. The Bible has stories filled with violence and frequently describes sorcery and witchcraft

3. Those games aren’t inherently evil…there like money, its not evil on its own, its only what’s going on in your mind that can make it a tool for evil

4. Boys need an outlet….I had toy guns when I was a kid, its not that different

5. Etc, etc, etc….lots of not very convincing arguments

The reason I am so interested in your opinion is that you seem to be able to be objective and honest with yourself and you also seem to care.   (( This is critically important to me, especially as I try to raise my children and be an example to them. As you evaluate the media you watch and the games you play, what criteria do you use to guide your decision regarding what you will and won’t watch/play? What is the logic behind your decision? Do you think it is a null issue? If so, why…it may help free me from further limiting my family’s media options. Do you think I have reason to be concerned? My goal at the end of this is to have a simple list of criteria for both me and my children. If a game or movie meets the criteria than we can play or watch it…if not, then we don’t. I am not even suggesting that all violence is necessarily bad…for example, Shindler’s List or some other movie on the holocaust might be acceptable but Transformers or other movies that glorify violence might not be,…or that all sorcery is evil…maybe Harry Potter is not permitted but Lord of the Rings is fine…but on what grounds? That is what I would like to clarify for myself. Would love your input….sorry for the long rant. Hopefully it all made sense. Hope you have time to respond, BoB

PS – In summary, if you had to make a “flow chart” of the decision process regarding entertainment choices (Movies, Games – both electronic and “old-fashioned”, Music, etc) and what you would or would not expose yourself too, what would it look like:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flowchart

No one I originally sent this too liked the flowchart request….I wasn’t trying to create a list of “rules”..only guidelines.  In other words, not a list of specific things that are evil or permitted or desirable…but simply a “what do you ask yourself when making decisions about entertainment” list of questions…apparently this request is upsetting to many people.

I will include the responses I received as comments to this post so you can see what others had to say.  I am working on my “flowchart” and will post it here when I finish.